A Brother’s Love
Bean found a dress in her closet and asked to put it on. It was last year’s Easter dress. She decided she looked like a princess. I have to agree.
Every princess needs a prince. Enter the Big Al.
How many 12 year old boys do you know who will play the part of “prince” for their 3 year old sister?
They danced and twirled and had the best time. It was so sweet! He loves his little sister and she loves him right back.
I hope he will always be her Prince.
My Passion, Part II
If you missed Part I, go read it here so you can know a bit more of my background and why I have this passion.
I have a heart for pregnancy centers and their ministry. I felt that a whole post about pregnancy centers would be better than just trying to cram everything into my last post.
If my family had not been willing and/or able to help me when I became pregnant with Big Al, I don’t know what I would have done. To my knowledge, there was not a center where I could go for help other than the Health Department and the services offered there through WIC and Medicaid.
I did not take advantage of Medicaid. I had good health insurance and I just didn’t feel right using it. I paid payments on my hospital bills for a couple of years. I used to joke that Big Al wasn’t paid for yet and they may repossess him if I didn’t pay my monthly payment.
I did, however, take full advantage of the WIC program. As a matter of fact, I would not have been able to buy Big Al’s baby formula without the WIC program. I did not abuse the program, though, and as soon as he didn’t drink formula anymore, I exited the program. I could afford to buy regular food but not formula. Only once did I have someone berate me in the check-out lane at the grocery store as I used my WIC vouchers. It was an awful experience but I knew that I was doing the best I could and, at that point, I had to rely on the WIC program for help.
Unfortunately, most women have emotional, spiritual, and material needs that cannot be met by a visit to the Health Department. That’s where the pregnancy centers come in.
**Just so you know, I will be referring to the pregnancy center that my mother-in-law directs and my experience with that center and others like it.
Women who come to the Center are greeted warmly. The people at the Center are there to love, nurture, and support the women they serve. They are not there to pass judgement. They are not there to scorn or to scold. They are there to show these women that there is someone who loves them regardless of what they have done.
“A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this all will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another.” -John 13:34-35
Here is an idea of what goes on at the Center:
A woman may come in, thinking she is pregnant. Maybe she has taken a home test and it is positive. Maybe she has seen a doctor and gotten a positive result. Unless the latter is true, the Center will provide a pregnancy test for her. If she tests negative, she will be counseled on pregnancy prevention, danger of STDs, etc. If she tests positive, she will become a client of the Center.
As a client of the Center, she will be able to learn how to properly care for herself and her baby. The Center offers many classes for the women they serve and their families. The classes may be anything from eating properly during pregnancy to childbirth preparation to feeding & caring for a newborn to infant CPR. As the women attend these classes, they will earn “Baby Bucks”, which can be used to purchase items for themselves or their babies.
The Center is stocked with maternity clothes for expectant mothers, baby clothes, diapers, formula, pacifiers, bedding, layette items, bottles…..the list goes on. Pretty much all of these items are donated to the Center by area churches and members of the community. Personally, I have passed along almost all of Bean’s baby items to the Center. These women do not care if the items are brand-new (or brand-name, for that matter), they are desperate for these items! Center employees and volunteers make sure the items donated are clean and safe.
Many of the women and men who come into the Center are hurting. Yes, I said men. Not all women who come to the Center are single. Sometimes the father accompanies them to the Center. The men need the Center as much as the women do. Their life is changing forever as well. The Center offers counseling to both women and men.
This particular Center is a Christian organization. They offer weekly Bible studies for the women to attend. The Center tries to make sure she at least hears the Gospel of Jesus Christ and knows that she has a Savior who loves her. It is our prayer that one day she will give her life to Christ, if she hasn’t already.
“Consequently, faith comes from hearing the message, and the message is heard through the word about Christ.” -Romans 10:17
Many of the women who visit the Center have not completed high school. The Center offers GED classes to their clients. When a woman receives her GED, she is given a check for a couple hundred dollars as a graduation gift from the Center. Most of the time, these funds are donated by someone specifically for this purpose. You would not believe the difference this small check may make in the lives of these women!
As you can see, the Center is so much more than a place for “hand-outs”. It is a place where women and their families are received in love and given a chance to learn how to be the kind of parent their child needs. It is a place where the love of Christ is shown every day in a variety of ways.
Because it is a Christian organization, the Center operates solely on donations. They receive no government funding. They have a few fundraisers throughout the year. The Baby Bottle campaign collects change in baby bottles from area businesses and churches. They also hold Diaper Drives at various churches to replenish the diaper supplies. There are times when they just have to run on faith, because donations are low and funds are becoming depleted but God always provides.
I hope you will consider donating to your local pregnancy center. If you can’t give of your money or baby items, consider giving your time.
Maybe you are like me and there isn’t a center in your area. Would you prayerfully consider opening one? I am. Hopefully I’ll have more information on this soon.
Serving Him by serving others,
My Passion, Part I
Every single day, I am reminded of how blessed I am. I am truly blessed!
I think back to my younger days and I thank God that He has led me to the place I am now. Things could have been so different for me.
(Mom, please don’t read this paragraph. Actually, make that the next two paragraphs, mkay?)
I began having sex at a very young age. Waaaay too young. My mom is probably reading this, even though I told her not to, so I won’t admit to just how young. When I was 18, I started drinking and partying with my friends. When I was 19, I starting smoking pot from time-to-time, depending on which friends I was with and how much I’d had to drink. I was headed down the wrong path and fast. But, God had other plans.
When I was 20 years old, after a weekend of hard partying to make up for the fact that my boyfriend of 5 years was sleeping with someone else, I found out I was pregnant. I was single. I was living at home with my parents and sister. I had been drunk less than 48 hours before. The only positive thing I really had going for me was that I had a good job at a bank and had good insurance.
I had gone to the Health Department for a free pregnancy test. The lady looked at me and said something along the lines of “Congratulations, you’re pregnant. Here’s a bottle of prenatal vitamins. The medicaid office is downstairs – if you sign up, they’ll give you a free carseat. The WIC office is down the hall” and she sent me on my merry way.
I was scared. What was I going to tell my parents? They would be so disappointed! What about the baby’s father? We had broken up and weren’t speaking. What in the world was I going to do?
That night, I sat down and told my mother. She covered her face and asked me what in the world we were going to do. I could tell she wanted to cry. Thankfully, she told my dad for me. Lord knows I didn’t want to do it. Dad took it pretty hard. He couldn’t look me in the eye for a while. They were heartbroken. But, they were there for me.
I don’t know what I would have done without my parents’ support during my pregnancy. Or the support of my friends, family, and co-workers. My child’s father chose to go about his own life, denying the fact that it was HIS child I was pregnant with.
My family bought baby stuff and maternity clothes for me anytime they could. I had lots of hand-me-downs and yard sale stuff, but they were stuff for me and for my baby. They were things that I didn’t have to money to buy on my own. All-in-all, I had three baby showers. I had everything I needed for Big Al.
I tried and tried to get a house for us. I didn’t want to still be living with my parents when he was born. I had tried to get a FHA loan but, even though the only debt I had was a $212 car payment, they said I didn’t make enough money to pay the payment. I tried to get a house built through a local non-profit agency but, with the money I was making and the fact that I couldn’t count my baby as a dependent until after he was born made it difficult to get the funding I needed. Eventually, I ended up getting a government subsidized apartment a month before Big Al was born.
My apartment was nice. It was one of the nicer apartments available, meaning the carpet wasn’t ripped or stained and there weren’t any holes in the walls or anything. There were large, walk-in closets in both of the bedrooms. It was on the ground level from the front, making it easy to carry Big Al in his carseat to the apartment. But it wasn’t all peaches and cream.
The people right beside me smoked so much pot that a huge puff of smoke came out into the breezeway every time they opened their door. The gal across from me had four kids and worked all night at a nightclub to provide for them. They were sweet little kids and I liked for her oldest son to come over to visit. She was trying hard to provide for her family. The man above me made nasty, vulgar remarks to me every time he saw me – even when I was 9 months pregnant. I always suspected the man across the hall from him was abusing his wife. He also gave me the “heebie geebies” with the way he looked at me. I had to find a way to get out of there. I just wasn’t willing to raise my child in that kind of environment.
I went back to the local non-profit agency and was able to get the funding I needed to build a house with a “low-income” loan. The best part was, it was only half a mile from my parents. Since my mom was babysitting Big Al, this was great! They were just right out the road and were always able to help me out. Big Al and I moved into our little 986 square foot home just 11 days before his first birthday.
Three months later, I started dating Hubby. He was working at the bank as well so we both had good jobs. God has continually blessed us over the past eleven years. I have been able to stay home with our children for nearly 9 years now. I recommitted my life to Christ eight and a half years ago. Our family has a nice home and reliable vehicles and good medical insurance. All of our needs have been met. It’s all by the grace of God.
But…..
What if my parents weren’t willing to help me when I told them I was pregnant? What if they had thrown me out of their house? What if I hadn’t had a good job? What if I hadn’t had reliable transportation to the Health Department for the free pregnancy test? By the way, I hear they aren’t free anymore. What if I hadn’t turned from my partying ways because I had a problem with drugs or alcoholism? What if my child’s father had pressured me to have an abortion? What if there was no one to help me get the things I needed for my baby?
Where would I have gone? What would I have done?
Enter the Crisis Pregnancy Center/Pregnancy Resource Center. I’m not talking about a place you can go to get an abortion or the morning after pill, either. I’m talking about a non-judgmental, loving, Christian environment where young women can go for help, support, and advice when they think they may be pregnant.
To be continued…..
I Refuse
Long time, no blog. Sorry about that. I’ve been a bit busy lately. Things are starting to calm down around here so hopefully I’ll be blogging more often. In the meantime, here’s something really on my heart today.
My Sunday School class has been doing a study by Max Lucado called “Out Live Your Life“. God is really using this study to work on my heart. I’ve always thought I was a caring person. But I’ve not been caring for others as Christ commands me to. He has forced me to look deep into my heart and ask some really difficult questions.
John 13:34-35 says “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”
Am I showing that kind of love to others? Only some. And, if I’m really honest with myself, “some” is really a small number. It’s easy to show love to those you know. Family, friends, other Christians. What about strangers? What about the lost? What about the homeless person on the street? What about the hungry? What about the young woman who is pregnant and alone? The list goes on.
I pray for those who are brought to my attention. I pray for my family, friends, and every prayer request that comes my way on Facebook. I pray for those who are hurting as a whole. But is prayer enough? I don’t think so. The song “I Refuse” by Josh Wilson has really convicted me.
Here are the lyrics:
Sometimes I, I just want to close my eyes
And act like everyone’s alright
When I know they’re not.
This world needs God, but it’s easier to stand and watch.
I could pray a prayer and just move on
Like nothing’s wrong.
But I refuse.
‘Cause I don’t want to live like I don’t care.
I don’t want to say another empty prayer.
Oh, I refuse to sit around and wait for someone else
To do what God has called me to do myself.
I could choose not to move
But I refuse.
I can hear the least of these crying out so desperately,
And I know we are the hands and feet of You, oh God.
So, if you say move, then it’s time for me to follow through
And do what I was made to do.
Show them who you are.
‘Cause I don’t want to live like I don’t care.
I don’t want to say another empty prayer.
Oh, I refuse to sit around and wait for someone else
To do what God has called me to do myself.
Oh, I could choose not to move
But I refuse.
To stand and watch the weary and lost cry out for help.
I refuse to turn my back and try and act like all is well.
I refuse to stay unchanged, to wait another day to die to myself.
I refuse to make one more excuse.
‘Cause I don’t want to live like I don’t care.
I don’t want to say another empty prayer.
Oh, I refuse to sit around and wait for someone else
To do what God has called me to do myself.
Oh, I could choose not to move but I refuse.
And that’s where I am right now. I refuse.
I have been praying fervently for God to speak to our class and to speak to me as an individual. I want to fully serve Him. I want to truly love others as He has loved me. I can already see His leading in my life and in the lives of my classmates. I know He has great things in store for us.
Go out today and show some love. You never know what a huge impact the smallest gesture may have on someone else’s life.
In His Service,
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